Until then, we are left to look back at the highlights from Germany and ponder their meaning as we gleefully saunter back into our nation’s little sports bubble.

(This column will bounce around like a cocaine-induced rant from Robin Williams’ early years. A function of cramming a lot into 1,400 words, and of not knowing a lot about any one topic in particular…)

First of all, let me speak for the Americans watching who were tiring of Oscar-caliber dives and girlish whining. Zidadene Zidane’s carnal headbutt to the chest of Italian Marco Materazzi was easily the coolest/most insane thing I've ever seen on a soccer field.

Don’t get me wrong. If I was French I’d be furious with Zizzou. (Fortunately I’m not French.) He lost control. He assaulted an opponent and got tossed from the biggest stage in sport with, oh, a billion people watching. He ended a legendary career on a disgraceful note. He deserves his ejection, $6,000 fine, and three-match suspension (funny because he’s retiring).

But hey, for a football and rugby fan with no rooting interest in the final, it was like a vicious fight scene rescuing a crappy romantic comedy. The move was Chuck Norris, Jet Li, and Tito Ortiz all rolled into one. One swift motion. Didn’t lift a finger. Trash-talking opponent floored. The guy looked like he’d been hit in the sternum with a sledgehammer.

And whatever Materazzi said about Zidane’s sister and/or mother must have been pretty bad, considering both players have refused to repeat it or even give a brief synopses. So the Italian was asking for it. And again, Zidane is still an idiot for doing it. (Although I do not believe it changed the outcome of the game.)

Speaking of Italians hitting the deck, Materazzi's was the one fall the Italians took this tournament that wasn’t a dive. Even Vlade Divac would be disgusted. Those guys flopped harder than You, Me, and Dupree ever could. Not that they were the only ones. But they were easily the worst I saw.

And dives don’t bother me as much as post-dive posturing. I don’t care how much getting nicked in the shin hurts; I’ve seen guys tear ACLs and appear to be in less pain. You can’t truly be that hurt, carried off in a stretcher, and return two minutes later. But refs buy it, and way too much. Which brings us to….

…Refs that need to swallow their whistles. One thing that can turn a potential American fan off a sport is the ability for a player to take a dive in the box, be rewarded with a late penalty kick, and score the only goal of a 1-0 game. Or see a player sent off for an aggressive play, giving the other team a permanent power-play. The record number of red cards was a clue that the refs inserted themselves too much into games, in a sport where one decision can turn a game completely, even in the early going.

(Officiating admittedly got better in the knockout round.)

Speaking of penalty kicks, they are possibly the silliest way any sport decides a tie game. It’s like deciding a tie football game with a punt, pass, and kick competition. Yes, it’s nice drama. It is also set up to create goats. Look at the two finals decided on PKs. Who remembers what Brazilians scored in 1994? I don’t, but I know Roberto Baggio ended the tournament by sending a ball over the net and into, what, the 45 ^th row? And this time it’s David Trezeguet who will need therapy after his shot cracked the crossbar. The shootout, since it is so slanted towards the shooter, basically becomes a competition not to choke.

But if you are looking for a hero rather than a goat…the goal by Maxi Rodriguez to send Argentina past Mexico 2-1 in their round of 16 match up was the best goal ever.

Ok, my sample size isn’t ideal. But I have seen a fair amount of soccer highlights. (I lived in Singapore for six years. They don’t do baseball.) The guy got a long pass in the 97 ^th minute, took it to the chest, wheeled, and fired a 20-yard heat-seeker, upper-90, with the ball never touching the ground. (I don’t know if Maxi is a lefty, but if he isn’t, bonus points for ambidexterity.) Throw in that it was a game-winner in a knockout game, and I defy you to find three better goals in terms of difficulty and importance. Seriously, educate me.

Speaking of goals, this World Cup didn’t see many of them. There were just under 2.3 goals per game (second lowest Cup total ever). And while I give credit to the Italians for allowing just two goals in their seven games in a stiffling defensive effort, that’s pretty boring to watch. Making it worse: the knockout play average was a meager 1.88. Yawn. I respect pitching duels; I just don’t want one every time I turn a ballgame on. In 64 games (128 team outings), 48 teams were shut out, a record rate. No one likes it when their team has a 37.5 percent chance of not scoring once. That’s over a third of the time that you will not celebrate once in a game.

(By the way, Switzerland somehow got eliminated without being scored on, a World Cup first. They lost in a shootout after 120 minutes of mind-numbing, 0-0 soccer with Ukraine in the first knockout round. The Swiss scored four goals in their four games. Funny how a Swiss attack is as much of an oxymoron in its soccer as in its military.)

Baseball lowered the mound, hockey axed the redline. If soccer wants to continue to expand, as any sport does, FIFA should think about tinkering with its game.

Nevertheless, more and more Americans find themselves watching the quadrennial event. It’s not mainstream yet, but its closer. The final rated a 7.0, third highest soccer rating in U.S. history, and highest since the 1994 World Cup in the United States. America is watching, and while the sport will never be a big-gun sport here, it isn’t done growing either.

Interest was propelled by increased coverage, better game times than the 2002 World Cup in Japan and Korea, and anticipation following the surprising U.S. run to the quarterfinals that year.

Unfortunately, this time the U.S. run was more like a tumble down a flight of stairs. It’s tough when the team misses the plane for Germany. With the exception of the Italy game, when the Americans tied and arguably outplayed the eventual champions (redefining hollow victories) and a few fleeting moments against Ghana, the red, white and blue were far duller than usual, even for soccer.

What does this mean for U.S. Soccer? Well, a coach is gone. Claudio Reyna and Brian McBride are done with World Cups. Authorities are still searching for Donavan and Beasley, missing since early June. And you can’t help but feel we have slipped back into the abyss of soccer mediocrity as the world laughs at the team’s number five world ranking from FIFA.

But here are three reasons the flop in Germany won’t hamper U.S. Soccer as much as some might think…

1) This doesn’t mean the U.S. is back in the Third World of soccer. The group was tougher than a rhino on steroids. Two European powers and a rapidly rising African one? Any good team could have stumbled out of that group with a sub-par performance. (Keep in mind, 2006 semi-finalist and 1998 champ France was bounced in group play in 2002.) Don’t fool yourself into thinking we are a top-10 world power, but don’t bury the U.S. program as an also-ran just because of this result.

2) Americans are starting to comprehend the fanfare and intensity that comes with the sport, and the event in particular. As bars start to come alive for games and people watch games the U.S. isn’t even in, you realize how far the sport has come in America in the last 12 years. Throw in the allure and passion of national team pride, virtually nonexistent in American sports, and you have an appealing package. And the fact that the tournament is played so rarely means Americans won’t get bored with it. Because come on, it’s a slow game.

3) We have short attention spans. Four years is an eternity. We won’t remember how bad we were by then. Heck, at this point reading this, you might already be thinking, "Ghana who?"

Four years until soccer matters again, four years until I type another syllable about the sport.